Summer, summer, summer time.

 It's just about that time of year again....

And like every summer, I have the dubious honor of labeling the season. Unfortunately the obvious names have already been used so I had to drill a bit deeper for this year's title. For this year I wanted a name that encumpasses an abundance of fun activities, but I want it to also have an element of danger to it... because as I remember that was the key to last year's phenominal summer (Summer of Sin). So after a minute of deep thinking, I was able to come up with a new title... Drum roll please.....

This years summmer is........: The Summer of STD....

Or its longer title...The Summer of "Something To Do".

I know it's not as flashy as prior years. and it might take some getting used to... but I think it's a fitting title.

I dont think any of us have any big plans, but I do want to keep myself busy and if something unexpected happens, it happens.....

I have created a small list of summer activities and I hope too keep adding more to the list.

If you got any suggestions or are interested in these, let me know.

Things to do:

- Boston / Cape Cod

- Rafting

- Riding to the beach (continuously)

- Fishing

- Yankee Stadium Tour / Yankee baseball

- Mets game (final season)

- Beach days

- Mountain Creek

- Jets Training Camp

Maybes:

- Summer Concert (Beach Boys if they play?)

- Beer Garden

- Hawaii (really wishful thinking)

...and when the smoke clears.

Aside from looking like a 25 year old version of the principal from "Back to The Future", I don't feel like I am getting older. Sure, I can't run around for hours like I used to, or fit into my old school velcro sneakers, but I still feel young at heart....However, after needing a whole weeknd to recover from an overnight trip to Atlantic City, I can tell I am not as youthful as I used to be. In all fairness though, I think this was the best trip since the original. Filled with laughs, shennanigans, and bafoonery.

 

For sake of nostalgia, let me try to summarize the trip: Myself, Bert, and Boye took the early train in. We left at about noon on a drizzly day. Jimmy was driving the ship and Bert and I were along for the ride. We seemingly made pretty good time, only hititng a small patch of traffic. Once in AC, we decided to hit up the AC Bar and Grill, which has become one of my favorite outside eateries. It probably equates to a local long island diner but in a place where money is tighter than Jon Contino's pants.. you learn to appreciate it. I had the mushroom pizza - for those of you wondering, ehhh- but I've certainly had worse. I was so hungry I could have eaten "a sadnwich from a gas station." : >

 

After eating, we hit the casino. We ran into the db formally known as "Shaolin". He along with the rest of MacArthur was there for the Sleshinger Fight. After a small "stop and chat" we dispersed, Boye hit the roulette table (where he was cleaning up) and Bert and I hit the slots. I had my usual zero luck, while Bert was managing to stay afloat. I tried to pace myself, knowing how easy it is to lose the whole bank roll in a matter of minutes. A couple drinks and a few twenties later we all met up again and decided to pre it up.. That was in essence the calm before the storm because once Tony, Scott, Brad and Mike Wildes arrived; things started to heat up.

 

Bert was a little loaded,and combine that with a riled up bunch of hooligans... that spells fun. Our room was turned upside down before we entered it. Bert somewhat provoked, somewhat not, started to show off the freak retard strength- by pushing every one in the room. Things got a little tense, when horseplay turned violent.. MFW landed a spinning back fist on Bertie.. but luckily cooler heads prevailed. The party then spilled back out to roulette table as everyone (except me and boye) put a hundo on black and won. More gambling ensued for the remainder of the evening, between there the poker room, black jack tables and video poker/slots. I then decided to rock the Casbah for a few, just to see what the hooplah was all about. I had a decent time in there but the real fun came soon after.

 

We all headed up to the rooms, all but MFW (who aside from the Shonie Carter impression, wasn't in the room all night.,,,living up to the title "Mike Fuckin Wildes"). In the room we tried to get some shut eye- but no1 could sleep. Between girls gone wild promos, Bert's limburger cheese feet, and everyone's fear of pranks no-one was ready to call it a night. We then got notice that Brad had "fallen asleep" in the other room. Once we got in the room, we saw some "smoke" and a "smoke detector" started to go off... a real elaborate scheme. Me, brad and bert left the room for safety, every1 else stayed in. Part 2 of the scheme had every1 found face down dead lol. After that prank we all attempted to sleep once again, but the fog machne made its way into our room and more "smoke" filled our room.

 

So much smoke that the real alarm went off! And let me tell you that shit is loud. We tried to muffle it, fan it, take it off- but it wouldnt stop. ..soon Security made its way to the room...The name tag said Ulyssis but he called himself "Mack". Luckily he had a sense of humor and after using our facilities, and once the smoke alarm stopped.. he went on his way. We then decided to play a trick on Tony who high tailed it, not only out of the room but all the way to the casino floor. We told him security kicked us out and the prank had a nice pay off as he grabbed the phone in cocnern only to find out no1 was on the other end.

 

I think i got like 40 mins of total sleep after that, even though I scored a whole bed to myself. It is impossible to wind down after a fun night like that. And to think I was considering not coming.

Gray skies are going to clear out...

After over a month of doom and gloom, I'm starting to turn the corner. And it's about time, things weren't looking good for quite a while. My house keeper was all set to call Mary-Kate Olsen. I'm just kidding, i don't really have a house keeper... but the situation was no joke... I was seriously getting concerned. I would just notice my bottom lip start to creep up and fold over, out of nowhere. I'd pout around the house, in private, and even at times at work. FYI- The puppy dog face might be cute when you're a kid, but isn't so cute when your a bald, 25 year old pencil pusher.

I spent hours (no joke) walking in my old foot steps. Alone with my thoughts... just me, the winter chill, and after a while, a security guard telling me to go home. I left in no better shape than when i started..which is disappointing b/c u would think I could have lost a few pounds...but more importantly- mentally i had no answers. It's hard to find the answers when you don't even know the questions.  I feel like I was doing all the right things, but I was saddled with the guilt of a serial killer. Its hard to explain, but to those that have been through it- they know what I'm talkin about.. its like you are on the right track, just on the wrong train.

I decided to try and make a few changes. I always try to improve myself, but after a while I fall back into the comfort zone. I was a stones throw away form making a HUGE change.... but much like my dream of becoming a pro wrestler.... it wasn't meant to be. I'm still flirting with making a power play... but we'll see what happens. For now I think i should just look into making summer vacation plans. i need something to look forward to.

I think the real catalyst for the mood change has been the weather. Spring fever is in full effect. It is almost miraculous what a little sunshine can do to one's spirits.  I decided to start walking during my lunch break to try and spice up my daily grind and I highly recommend it.

Speaking of recomending, I highly recomend the movie "Forgetting Sarah Marshall".  This movie is hilarious, the girls are hot, and besides all that..who doesnt love a good puppet show? Best movie since Juno.

Every so often I get into a rut. I wake up with a frown and like a bad case of herpes I can't seem to shake it. I know i've written about it thousands of times before, but once again its back... I don't know how, why, and when it happens, its just a cycle that has continued from even my earliest of days.

I've given up trying to find answers, I just accept it as part of my dimented DNA. So in attempt to improve, i've been trying to surround myself with things that make me happy...food,  music, yankee baseball.... but so far-  balls. I've secluded myself from the rest of civilization in an attempt to de-funkify myself. I know being around a downer isn't fun so im doing my damn-dest to chipper up.

Anyway, on Friday my buddy from Canon sent over a goodbye email. I was really shocked by it. I hadn't seen him much since he transferred to another position about 1.5 years ago. He was a smart, self motivated employee. But above all us, he was a good friend. I'd look forward to christmas parties and other staff meetings in which I knew I could catch up with him. There was a time when I went to him for advice and he went above and beyond to help me out. So i'm gonna mis him... but thats also got me thinking about my current positoin and maybe its time for me to start making some changes. Finally take the GMATS, get back to school... get a new job... who knows..

One certain change is my home life. My brother will be getting out soon. and i say that like its a prison here, and at times it is, but for the most part it isnt too bad. Anyway, Frank is gettin married  in June and then he's peacing out. I think hes not going too far which is good news for me b/c I might need to somwehere to stay. Plus papa Cats is retiring sooner rather than later (also in June) so i have begun casually apartment shopping. It would kill me to get an apartment but I think i'd be happier with a change of scenery. It's another who knows.

Shuffle

Not to get all philiosophical in the '08, but  life really does equate to a game of cards.  As they say, "You've got to know when to hold 'em and when to fold 'em."...and even more so, you got to know when to leave the table.  I think I've proven that my decision making skills are worse than Michael Vick's. I stay to the bitter end, playing the short stack like it's my life support .  I'm truely the pathetic gambler, or the sucker.

In every aspect of life, thats my major down fall. I can't get out in time. I can't get out on top. I'm not smart enough to see the "Kansas City Shuffle" until it's too late. But i think last night, I kind of saw the writing on the wall. As Billy Joel sang, "Say goodybe to Hollywood."  Changes are forth coming. It's time to shuffle up and re-deal. Clean slate in '08.

A huge thank you to Tony and Meg, for doing SOMETHING last night. And not only doing something, but for inviting me and making it fun. I can honestly say that I had a great time, and i didn't want to be any where else. PLUS, we got a crazy hook up. We were downin drinks like drunken sailors. We guestimate at least 10 shots each, plus jack and cokes, Miller lights, bud lights, food and of course the bubbly...and then the ball dropped, and we drank some more. hahaha. GOOD TIMES.

Next Friday I think I'm going to go into the city for an "inexpensive" night of drinking with the Canon kids. I'm throwing it out there to any1 interested, but I really don't expect any1 of you guys to come. It should be cool  though, the people that are going are really  fun people and drunks!! It'll be nice to kick back and throw a few back with them.

25 to Life

Two years ago, I recall using the monicor "big things in '06"  with huge optimism.... and that def. foreshadowed a horrific begining to a year which i still want to forget. I either learned my lesson or I was just too scared to be optimistic to start this past year. So to begin 2007, i didnt do my normal hype. I kept it low key, like Tim Allen's carear...I didn't write out my expectations for the new year and I didnt want to reflect on "ohhh 6". In retrospect maybe I should have, but '06 was so shitty for me that I didn't want to set the bar, I just kind of wanted to limbo my way through the year.  

People always say that good things happen when you least expect it.. and i really wasnt expecting much for 2007.  However, as the year chugged along, I rarely felt overwhelmed. You can just scroll down and see that i havent really written much in the past 12 months..and knowing that i basically use this forum solely to vent- that's a good thing. So overall 2007 was a pretty good year for me. Even though I don't think I achieved ANY of my goals, I feel I made a lot of good decisions which are significant building blocks towards the future.

Highlights/memories of 2007: My first promotion, Sumer of Sin- Las Vegas, Bert's party (BP CHAMPS! ...and steven jackson), trip to Chicago, "see you at the hoover dam", Kara's graduation/Sim's birthday (long beach, mets' game, Nutty), 4th of July at Raquel's, Shuffle Board, 1st Monday night football, The historic Giants game, Mountain Creek, Happy Hour, Red Lobster, Christmas Party, Scavanger hunt, Haunted Hayride trip, Wiz of Oz,  Old Westbury Radio, Thanksgiving, Victorious sports weekend.

Now that I'm 25 this is it. I dont really feel I have a lot of time to waste anymore. So with 2008 around the corner, i dont want to say "big things"... but I do hope for a little bit better. In a lot of cases, I know what has to be done, its just a matter of doing it. '08 represents a fresh start. A year which is more wide open than the legs of 1 of the Spears' sisters. 

When Im here alone and ur there at home, hello

In the words of Neil Diamond, "hello, my friend, hello".

It's been a lilttle while since I stepped up to the mic. I think i have had a long case of writer's block which is kind of pathetic considering this forum is about anything and everything. I guess I've just been waiting for a muse or that stick of dynamite. But truth be told- I'm sick of waiting. So i figured i'd find my inner Forrester and "PUNCH THE KEYS".  And, since my life is like a well that has run dry.. let me start off with a little current events.

The Mall shooting in Omaha Nebraska

The police say this kid was depressed, so he decided take a rifle to the mall and do some skeet shooting. On his suicide note he said that he wanted to "go out in style".... Well, pardon me but I belive that mass killings haven't really been "in style" since the Hitler days.  Lets be honest, Hitler had consentration camps and gas chambers...you might not like it, but that shit's impressive. It wasn't just a kid with an oozie who was pissed b/c he didnt get teddy rucksbin for x-mas. .. No, Hitler was a short  grumpy muchkin with a Charlie Chaplan mustache that controled an army of mercanaries.  Kudos and hats off. I can't even get my friends to respond back to an e-vite, and Adolf Hitler has strangers killing Jews. Thats like some David Blaine shit.

But since Hitler it's been done to fucking death (pun intended). And done poorly too i might add. This most recent attempt is one of the saddest in history. Obviously this Napolean Dynamite looking bastard put zero thought into this. I mean if your going to go to the mall and kill people- why do it randomly?  Have a fucking purpose. Do the world a favor and kill the store greeters at the Gap, Express and Aeropastle .. or get the people that pass out flyers or the vendors that are always asking "can i ask you a questions." Bang, Bang, Bang... maybe then you'll make a god damn difference in the world. But no, this dopey fuck decides to pick out of a hat. and i keep calling him names, in part b/c i dont know his real name. Aside from those who knew him in real life and those that live in his town...his name will not be remembered. He migth be top story for a day, or in the papers for a month...but thats it. He won't be remembered. Look at that Chinese nut case that killed people at his school. If I remember correctly, he did have somewhat of a purpose.. he was mad at his ex girlfriend and he prob hated the school... so he went guns a blazing. But he atleast had the foresigth to know that no1 would remember his name. So he dubbed himself "Questionmark". which would have been the same answer if someone asked me today what his real name was. But the list goes on and on... does any1 know one of the guys from the Colombine shooting? I think I'm one of the few people that even remember the unibomber let alone his name (Ted Kazinsky). So people who do this to go out in style or to be famous aren't even smart enough to realize that nomatter what they do no1 will give a shit. They end up a punch line in most comedian's sets. So really  they are are leaving as even bigger jokes as they came in. sad but true.

And honestly I dont know how I feel about suicide. A lot of people call it the cowards way out..but is it? i think you have to have a lot of moxie to end your own life. That shit takes balls. Some people call it selfish and i def. understand that. leaveing your family and friends to grieve is def. in poor taste, but if your life is so fucked up and you feel that you cant take another second..who am I to judge. Maybe they really are "in a better place".

Moving on... I'm trying to get back to where i was a few months ago, maybe even a year ago. Back on my grind. Trying to get back to the gym, and trying to be a  better me in every way possible. It's a social experiment that usually last a couple months.. but lets see how it goes.