Dec. the Halls

I don't know how many more journals I'll be able to squeeze in before the new year so i figured i'd add a little bit more today and pretty much whenever i can. I know i'd like to have 1 more large blog to kind of tie this year in a little bow...but we'll see if time allows it...obviously today is not the day. Today i'd rather focus my self professed "busy month."

Let me start by saying that I HATE December. I hate this month almost as much as i hate terrorism, diseases and Kanye West.... December's like the kid who got picked last in gym class. If December  was personified it be the Bladwin brother that no1 really cares for ....or for my black friends, it's the Sean Wayans of months.

 First of all it's cold, and im talking brutally cold. What's sad is that the weather has just started to change and and i'm already starting my winter rant. The thing is I just know its gonna get a lot worse before it gets better. Don't get me wrong, I like wearing sweaters but  lets get real- if i don't have to shiver like a leaf on a dying tree- i'd prefer not to. Waking up early and defrosting the car sux  more than words can describe. Everyday i mutter obscenities as i scrape the ice off the windshield. Furthermore, I really loathe the people who say "i love the snow"....i always act really surprised but what i really mean to say is "Aww that's b/c ur an idiot...Move to Antartica". These people are usually females and don't lift a finger when its time to shovel. I hate to stereotype but that's just what i've noticed. Basically if you love the snow - ur not out there enough...and driving in it is chaos. I think driving on a sunny day can be dangerous- adding snow is like adding bazookas to a friendly paintball game.

But another reason i don't like December is because of the holidays. During the year I don't go shopping b/c i never know what to get myself...but now i gotta do my best john edwards impression and pick something for people i don't really know..I dont mind getting gifts for family cuz well..they're family!!! But people from work and neighbors and ...this holiday is out of control. Are we forgetting that this holiday is built on a lie?? I'm not even talking about the so called "jolly fat man". But since you brought it up- Why do we have to lie to these kids- I think telling them that Mommy and Daddy bought the presents would make the kids respect his/her parents more than giving all the credit to a bushy bearded miracle man with a magic slay. I'm talking about the "virgin" Mary. Unless her full name is Mary Houdini... I just don't get it. But every year i am forced to partake in the gift giving. I have to go to the mall and push my way through like i'm at a metallica concert. AND What is with the store greeters in every store?? "Hello, how are you...need any help" STFU!!! I cant help but think "Aren't there any other jobs you can be doing, are u really getting paid for this??" I swear to god i hate it- i purposely pick up clothes that i'd never wear unfold them as if i am interested in making a purchase and drop them...basically saying "here, do something and fold this!!" (for those of you who witnessed my blunder "Jesus died on christmas" i am certainly embarassed... i have gone through years and years of religious instruction and u'd think i'd know that x-mas was his birthday...haha-thanks Wildes--i suck)

Another reason i hate December (and so should you) is b/c i was born on this vile month. Every December I feel older and older and it sucks. The good times are over- i only have social security and retirement to look forward to.  My friends know the deal by now and they dont even acknowledge my birthday. I think pretty much everyone knows the date (i tried my hardest to keep it a secret but somehow the secret got out) which is fine as long as i don't get any special attention. i don't like to be singled out- i'm no better than anyone else so why should i have my own special day??

But with age comes change- a man who thinks the same at 23 years old as he did when he was 18 has wasted 5 years of his life...I like to think i haven't wasted my life. I think i have changed-maybe not dramatically but definitely a little bit..I've gotten a little mentally tougher...and a bit more hateful. I still am nicest to know- i just know a lot less people. I remember deleting my entire buddy list as kind of a social experiment to see who my true friends were.  I dont want to go into the long process but i basically kept myself on block for the entire 5 years..up until now. I dont think i need to block people anymore- it's time to grow up. It's time for more growing, more changes...2006...Stay Tuned